Let Loose the Berserkers!

My mother was the one who really introduced me to the world of monsters, although she probably won't fess up to it. Her love of such classics as "Tarzan" "Clash of the Titans" and any Sinbad film were probably my introductory level into the paranoramal and fanstique. Minotaurs, griffons, gorgons and the kraken, sabertooths, serpents, flying horses and such planted seeds in my imagination that I simply could not shake. I can recall writing stories and sketching monsters from as early as ten.

If I could point to one work as being the most inspirational to me as a writer it would have to be Clive Barker's "Nightbreed." I adore literally everything about the tale of a man who believes that he is a monster, but discovers what a true monster is. The film and the novel speak to the power of perception and the reality of what true monsters are, and of course the so-called freaks bear more humanity than any of the so called humans. Before there was paranormal was popular, Clive gave life to characters of spectacular design, beautiful horror and wild depths.

Is it a paradox that a being who looks like a demon complete with horns has more compassion than a priest or that psychiatrist can do more damage than a hulking beast? The themes fascinate me and have done so throughout my undergraduate studies of lauded and award-winning writers and onto my career as a romance writer.

I have written many works, the majority of them about paranormals. My need to give them the same depth, love and development as Clive gave to his, is a definite driving force for me. I need for them to have a rich history, honor and intelligence is something that I truly hope that I portray on every page. In my novel, "The Thief of His Heart," I wanted to develop a culture of werecats that spanned ancient times through to contemporary, stressing the importance of their traditions to the reader as well as to the main character. The love interest of the main character, Crnswar is an intimidating force, both capable of violence, authority and love.

I have written about werewolves, vampires, demons, sorcerers and even gargoyles (and will again soon) but their outward appearances are just beautiful drapes, that they love and honor and respect one another is what I fight for and ultimately what I as an author seek to define.

When I take on a monster for a novel or short story, I ask myself several questions, such as:

* What would they eat? Of course a werewolf would eat meat, but a gargoyle would enjoy stone.

* What would they wear? A werecat would either wear little or walk around in couture.

* How do they live? Secluded or in plain sight of humans? A sorcerer can go to the mall, but a golem couldn't

* How do they have fun? A were might like to watch nature programs on the Discovery channel where as an ice sorcerer might take to making ice cream or carving sculptures.

* What would fascinate them? Gems might fascinate cats, Serpentoids might love music and of course werecats would like catnip.

* How do they have sex? Hehehehe, I can get carried away with this.

* If there was a store that catered only to X type of paranormals, what would it sell? Gargoyles might like loofahs, goblins might like caramel apples, a witch would love a candle store, Weres might like heated muscle relief cremes after every change.

All in all, deciding upon or creating the creature to use, while fun is something that dresses up the novel, not defines it. The creatures actions are what should stand out most of all. Yes, I write about monsters, but they are not monstrous. And yeah, Clive Barker made that evident to me in his writings, art and even films (although I think it is high time that Guillermo del Toro redid Nightbreed because only he can).

Silly perhaps, but in the realm of world-building just a few of the questions that help me to bring and breath life into my monsters.

Suckin' It Up and Pushing Forward

There's nothing like reading reviews of your work to sober a writer up. I said writer, not amateur or aspiring, not good or great or bad...just a writer. I'm an addict, addicted to writing and the process in that all consuming crack-head type way. I long for nothing but words and dreams. Am I always on point? Hell no. My reviews run the gamut. I get some good ones, some ones where readers wonder about my sanity and my capability to plot, some are full of praise and detail and some are short to the point of 'didn't like it.' Does it affect what I do? No. Because I am an addict. I will continue to write and weave stories. I don't know how many times I have been asked, how can I become a writer by folk with good intentions and high hopes. I always tell them two things. 1> Complete your project and 2> Don't obsess over reviews. Don't get me wrong, I listen to a good critique, I live for it, especially when it's detailed, long and thoughtful. I actually love getting rejection letters that are longer than two pages. A one-liner...not so cool though, I take it in...and keep on writing. So, as I return to another one of my self-absorbed yarns, I keep the advice and critiques good and bad, but that horse, that drug of typetypetype has a hold on me...well at least until the editors get a hold of me, but when they don't...the writing must go on and a few drinks helps to make it..Irie.

Epic Fails, Netflix, OCD and Multi-Tasking

Um...yeah the notorious World of Warcraft addiction is somewhat under control now, but the raging Netflix beast has arrived in full force. Luckily I have that nifty Windows 7 thing going on, which allows me to split a screen like a mofo. While I strive to be a more disciplined and studious writer, I find my OCD pushes me toward several tasks rather than one. But then yes, my word count suffers. I make no bones about my love of writing, but if there was a word to describe my state, then it would be scatterbrained. I keep several types of notation devices to remind me of things I should do, can do and would like to do, regular blogging being one of them, but alas distractions occur. There have been a few successes, and well executed plans, such as the promo event and gift basket arrangements for The Romance Studio's Valentine Gala. In 2011 I had three novels come out. I strive to have 3 this year...high hopes? Maybe. Does it help that I'm watching season 3 of "Bones" right now...uggh. Hey, at least it's not WoW-related. My epic, level 85 Human Warrior with bitchan war-axes is on hold, so I must be productive...at least until the new expansion drops. Hehehe.

Procrastinating Even With Resolutions

I was supposed to blog at least once a week. That was one of my New Year's Resolutions and well, better late than never. Right?

Well since I last officially blogged, I've been toying around with that internet crack called Facebook. And while playing fruitless but exhilarating games I worked some on keeping my fan page updated. While Facebook does seem to reach a large audience with its moderate length, on the minute flashes of news, I think that blogger and blog type formats are for a more concentrated briefing. It allows the space and has the formatting for an in-depth pondering. It has the mood for it, I think. So, I really intend to blog more. At least every two weeks. I'm even setting it up on my calendar. Tuckering down, I am.

So, since this post within itself is just another type of resolution, I propose to have my first real post on Friday. Okay, leaf turning over...leaf turning...

Conventions, PC Gaming and Obsessions.

2/13/10

As this is my last tour of duty with Katsucon, I must admit that I was not expecting to attend what has probably been one of the coolest and most meaningful panels that I have ever attended at this particular function. Perhaps it is due to my latest addiction, but the WoW-centric “MMOs Unite: WOW: Wrath Edition” panel was a highly entertaining panel if not very informative on a personal level. In fact I believe that I have made quite a few self- discoveries, in that I will never ever be a championship-level MMO player.

The panel speaker, Manny Camacho showed his obvious love for warlocks and disdain of the warrior-class aside, yet was still brilliant! The CEO and founder of GPX gaming Inc approached the game from a mathematics standpoint that had me wanting to break out a pen and paper for a few equations. He spoke of the various class damage scales in ways that would make school kids madly enthusiastic about math and PVP encounters. And while he didn’t apply that higher level of math to the economy of the AH and WoW universe, it was still blatantly obvious that gaming encompasses so much more than sole entertainment.

But the brilliance didn’t end there! Oh no. While Manny didn’t touch upon the crippling damage done by gaming obsessions, or the sociological damage done by hours spent hooked into the game, I believe he illustrated it damn well.

He showed this video (Funeral in WoW) and while the room lit up with laughter, mine too…I couldn’t believe what I was seeing and how I might have been the one to have done something so crass in my obsession.

You see, apparently a young woman died in real life and her friends decided to have an in-game funeral for her in a neutral contested area, which the Horde(an opposing faction) proceeded to attack as if they were raiding a low-level dungeon (ahem, Deadmines). While I laughed and cried during this the showing of this video, the main thing on my mind was that if that were my friends funeral I would make sure that payback ensued…in game and like a mad mutharfucka!

I don’t have to go into details about addiction, there are others with worse sob stories than mine, but for some reasons this was the point when I had to leave. Why? Because it can’t be that serious and yet it is at times… Am I getting help for my addiction? No but realizing the problem is a quarter of the battle.

Alas, as I prepare to do my last all-nighter for Katsucon at the Gaylord Hotel (a very swank establishment I might add) I will miss all the anime kids, the platform gamers (there is no love for the PCers in the game room)and the nights of consuming mass quantities of sugar and caffeine while. But I will be attending Balticon…and at one point perhaps Blizzcon, who reeeeaaally needs to have an event on the North East Coast.

Selfishly...It comes

I cried for a moment, had my own little pity party and booted up World of Warcraft the day that I decided that I needed a bit of a writing break, the day I excused myself from writing circles and decided to float. I can't rightly say that I'm going to be published again and I definitely can't MAKE it happen. I have a full time job and can get by, although extra dough would be nice. So while traipsing about in Northrend, or waiting patiently for another raid to begin, for yet another night, I return to square one.

I was always a gamer. World of Warcraft is slightly more addictive than Final Fantasy but I have always engaged in some type of game playing. I played social Advance Dungeons and Dragons for years and have had consoles for as long I can recall, but my love of writing and reading has never waned. I've taken time to write, be it a small amount or a massive amount of time, and even though my raiding schedule can get pretty hectic...and ridiculous (5 hours trying to best Sunwell sucks)I was pleasantly surprised to turn out a few pages today.

While I would love to blame WoW for my lack of writing, I can't. I can't say that I've lost an obsession that has been with me longer than I can recall. What I can say is that a break was needed. So many nights spent typing away in a vacuum of my imagination needed to be countered with a little social interaction, even if it is "Nice heals," "Good Run," or "Buff up."

The camaraderie I get doing a run or socializing with the guild offers me something that muse often doesn't. Interaction. My muse loves wild things like anti-heroes, assholes, near-villainous protagonists and banter. I try to steer it towards the happy, happy and it seeks the dark. It prods me with it's belly full of all the hardcore scifi and horror novels I've been reading. (Thanks Neal Asher, Matthew Reilly and Edward Lee). My muse points and I follow. There is little interaction involved.

The craft of writing is pretty much a lone job. You write and you present what you created. Rejection letters seldom come with detailed explanations, that is NOT the publishers job. Critique partners can often sugar-coat, pass off or completely ignore a story. Fans may enjoy your story but rarely leave feedback...but my guild tells me immediately when I fuck up and when I do a good job.

I'm selfish. I've been told that before but truly in this time when I have slowed down my writing time, I think that when I do eek out a page or two, that I feel better...less the tortured artist alone in her workroom struggling with the prose. As I stopped pushing and hoping and worrying about writing, it comes...it always did. It's selfish too that way.

Fastest Rejection Evah

In less than 5 days. Yeah that was pretty quick.